This is what you people wasted the last six years on? Is that a joke?
Is that a hickey?
Relatedly: How did I manage to go 25 years without getting a hickey?
What, in god’s name, is the letter that starts the words boy and bar doing on my bra?
Why is it so hard to find a greeting card that doesn’t make me want to vomit?
What, exactly, constitutes booty shorts? And how would one know if one inadvertantly purchased them?
Flats or flip-flops?
Curly or straight?
Tequila or tequila?
At what age does it become unacceptable to eat Drumstick ice cream cones? For breakfast?
Does Christie Lee ever get angry? Sad? Show a negative emotion of any kind?
Do I have anything to write about?
Well, I think we answered that last one, at least.