provocative questions confronted by yours truly this week

This is what you people wasted the last six years on? Is that a joke?

Is that a hickey?

Relatedly: How did I manage to go 25 years without getting a hickey?

What, in god’s name, is the letter that starts the words boy and bar doing on my bra?

Why is it so hard to find a greeting card that doesn’t make me want to vomit?

What, exactly, constitutes booty shorts? And how would one know if one inadvertantly purchased them?

Flats or flip-flops?

Curly or straight?

Tequila or tequila?

At what age does it become unacceptable to eat Drumstick ice cream cones? For breakfast?

Does Christie Lee ever get angry? Sad? Show a negative emotion of any kind?

Do I have anything to write about?

Well, I think we answered that last one, at least.

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